There is nothing more exciting than finding the person that you know is the one, the person who you want to spend the rest of your life with. Don’t let your excitement get the better of you, however! Make sure that before you tie the knot, you’ve taken the time to have some sessions of premarital counseling. It might seem wrong to get couples counseling before there have been any serious issues, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. Premarital couples counseling with a couples therapist is an excellent way to set up your future marriage for success, taking care of issues before they even happen by preparing with strong communication for a stable and healthy relationship. If you’re still on the fence about the idea, consider these three important issues that are worth discussing before marriage, issues that can be handled best with assistance from a marriage counselor.
1. Having Children
The topic of kids has ended more than a few marriages when the couple doesn’t see eye on how to handle the idea of eventually raising them. Sometimes people want to have children right away, excited to be a mother or a father as soon as possible. Others also want kids, but only after having had some time to enjoy adult life without them. And of course, there are people who would be satisfied never having children at all. Just knowing about whether or not you want children out of your life isn’t quite enough either. It’s very important to discuss how you will raise your children, should you want them of course. Agreeing on parenting style is very important to stop future arguments and ensure that your children will grow up in a stable and united home, with quality role models in you and your spouse.
Money is rarely an easy topic to discuss at the best of times. It’s even harder to discuss as a series of hypotheticals, the actions that you as a couple will take through the twists and turns of the future. What is your future career path? How about your spouse’s? What will you both do if one or the other’s doesn’t work out? Are you both planning to buy a house? How will you together handle an expensive emergency, like the loss of a car? How about a medical emergency? Not making a plan is a plan to fail, and having considered these sorts of money-related issues in advance will make it so much easier should one come to pass. Nobody likes discussing the possibility of failure, but doing so will make you happier, healthier, and safer in your relationship in the future.
3. Addressing Confrontations
Even the most laid back couple will inevitably find themselves in an argument. It’s unavoidable. Alternatively, you and your fiance may be the sort of fiery personalities that have arguments all the time. Either way, it’s a good idea to work out strategies and develop communication skills that can help prevent disagreements from dealing lasting damage to your marriage. Conflict resolution skills are something that everyone can benefit from, and there’s no better way to learn them than under the tutelage of a skilled relationship counselor.
Although it is, of course, possible to have these sorts of conversations without the aid of a counselor, having one to help mediate the discussion about such issues can be incredibly important in ensuring that everything necessary is discussed, with a neutral arbitrator to help prevent tempers from flaring. Here at He Said She Said we have many different kinds of relationship counseling programs, from premarital counseling to marriage counseling, available to suit the needs of any couple. Give our programs a look, and give us a call at (520) 955-1876 if you are ready to set up your future marriage for success.